Asians Rock! At least for this month...

I've been invited to speak at Missouri State University tomorrow night to talk about why Asians rock (seriously) for Asian American Heritage Month. MSU likes to start celebrating in April, though the official month is May.

There are so many things I want to say about this. But, I really need to be tweaking my speech right now.

Like the video, there are really great things about being Asian American. First of all, I always thought of myself as being American first before my ethnicity. But, I do take great pride in being a Korean-born Asian.

I do wish more people in the Ozarks took pride in their backgrounds, that diversity was placed at a higher importance than we've seen in the workplace, schools, the community. I wish we had more business and community leaders who fought for change, ensured equality, and enlightened others about their differences. It is a struggle everywhere in this country, but since I live in the Ozarks, I'm focused on what positive changes can be made HERE.

It is a marathon, not a sprint. In the meantime, enjoy the YouTube video... and if you'd like, come hear me speak! Other great speakers will be there, too. Thursday night around 7 p.m. at Plaster Student Union, third floor.

Asians and Toasters

Two things.

#1 First of all, I said this about a week ago on Facebook, but I'm really enjoying being apart of the new oppressed minority.

So far, it's been pretty fun. Yesterday, someone said something weird about Asians in front of me... and I would've said something, but then I thought, "Why bother? We are the new oppressed minority!"


Anyway, if you don't know what I'm talking about, CHOCOLATE NEWS on Comedy Central recently declared Asians as the new oppressed minority. Now that Obama is the President-Elect, blacks are no longer the most oppressed! You may be asking yourself, "Why Asians?" After all, we are stereotyped for being smart, good at math, and exotically exotic. I don't really want to repeat David Alan Grier's reasoning, but it has something to do with a misnomer concerning the Asian male anatomy.

#2 Has anyone been to Toasters Breakfast Cafe?



I was pleasantly surprised! I was working at the PRK when my stomach yelled, "FEED ME!"... I gave them a call because they were close in proximity. I told them I wanted a breakfast sandwich to-go since I would be taking it back to the library. It took less than five minutes (not an exaggeration), and it cost about $2. I quickly glanced at the menu, but I don't recall anything being more than $3 (despite the above picture I found on the Internet.) Even omelets were like $2.75--and they're open late night! My kind of place. I'm a new fan.

Holy Mole-y!

I got another Asian-y story for you. Sorry, but I guess when it rains it pours.

So, I was at a public place the other day... and some guy randomly comes up to me and says, "Hey, let me guess... you're Korean, right?"

"Yes," I said.

Guy: "Do you want to know how I know?"

MS: thinking, uh, no...but instead I blurt, "Sure!" (WHY NOT?)

Guy: "It's because you have a mole."

(MS thinking, WTF?!)

MS: "What?"

Then suddenly, out from behind me, another guy says, "Dude, that is the stupidest thing I've ever heard! A mole?"

(MS thinking, "Thank you!")

Then Guy #1 says, "No, seriously. I lived in China for six years. I know. The only people who have moles are Korean and Japanese. I swear."

Guy #2 says, "I don't care. That is stupid."

(MS again, thinking, "Thank you!")

Guy #2 continues, "A mole doesn't mean anything. You can tell she is Korean because she has a flatter face."

(MS thinking, WTF!? Guy #2 was doing so well!)

END SCENE.

Guy #1 apologized and said he didn't want to offend me. Really, it was pretty damn funny. Molie! Molie! Molie!

Asian Women = Hot Babes

ABC's Martin Bashir has Asian fever.

First of all, who the heck is Martin Bashir? You may recognize him on ABC's Nightline... his claim to fame before that was interviewing Michael Jackson in a 2003 documentary. Bashir caught Jackson looking especially creepy if I remember correctly. I couldn't watch the whole thing because, well, I was creeped out.

Anyway, Bashir made a statement last week at the UNITY conference in Chicago (for "journalists of color".) What he said made me puke in my mouth a little bit.

Bashir made a tasteless remark when he spoke in front of a group of Asian American Journalists. According to the Star Tribune, shortly after he began, Bashir remarked how exciting it was for him to be in a room full of great looking "Asian babes." Then he said he was glad to be standing behind a podium so no one could see how excited he really was.

EK, DISGUSTING!

The senior VP of ABC News, Jeffrey Schneider, says, "This kind of remark has no place in any setting and Martin knows that and is truly sorry for his serious error in judgment."

ABC's Juju Chang described it as a "ridiculous joke." "I thought 'oh, man, what an inappropriate thing to say.' But I've known Martin for a long time. He's a good man who said a dumb thing. He has since apologized to me for his boorishness and I know he deeply regrets it," Chang said in a statement.

Here's Bashir's letter of apology:

Dear Madam,

I wanted to write and apologize for an inappropriate comment that I made at the AAJA dinner last Friday and for the offence that it caused to those present. Upon reflection, it was a tasteless remark that I now bitterly regret. I am grateful to you for the opportunity to address those present and hope that the continuing work of the organization will not by harmed or undermined by my moment of stupidity.

Yours truly,

M Bashir

------------------------------

YIKES. SUCKS FOR HIM. HE'S TOTALLY EMBARRASSED. I FEEL KIND OF SORRY FOR HIM.

However, you know I can't let this rant go by. Why, for the love of Pete, can't people stop talking? I understand it wasn't a malicious joke, but it still annoys me. Let's be real. Why would he say that? This joke teeters the line of objectifying Asian women.

Why would he address an entire crowd of Asian people that way? That is why I say he objectified Asian women... you can't address an entire race/culture/skin tone/group in a way that is sexual and frankly, dirty. If you do, then 1) you come across as a perv and 2) you come across as a perv who objectifies people.

Would he have addressed the other groups at UNITY in the same manner? (The National Association of Black Journalists, National Association of Hispanic Journalists and Native American Journalists Association were all present for the convention.) "Thanks for having me. I'm so glad to speaking in front of all these hot, black babes," I imagine Bashir saying. "Wow! These Native American women are giving me a stiffy!," if only Bashir would've said.

Saying "Asian babes" certainly does not reach the obscenity levels of those XXX-rated companies that portray Asian women as submissive, exotic, and loose... but I do think it's too close for comfort. I certainly would not want to spend ANY time with a man who asked me out on a date simply because I am Asian-looking. Gross! I suppose it can be an added bonus since it does have something to do with my identity, but I've met plenty of guys who are only interested in Asian women. I have a friend who calls them "VANILLA RICERS"! Icks-nay on the anilla ricers-vay.

STUPID QUOTE OF THE DAY

I get into tiny arguments with my fiance, Jim, about how openly racist people are in the Ozarks without even knowing it.

**Let me clarify, I do like the Ozarks. I'm not making fun of all of the people who live here.**

However, let's be honest. This area has a reputation for being one of the "whitest" areas in the country, though I'm really not sure if that's completely accurate. We do have a lovely KKK leader near Harrison, Arkansas. We did have lynchings in Springfield. It is a fact that blacks in Pierce City, Forsyth, and Harrison were forced to leave their homes nearly 100 years ago. Wiped away, banished.

courtesy Banished American Ethnic Cleansings

Click here and here to see earlier posts on Banished

And I could talk for hours about the annoying little things that have happened to me or my friends. This week, we had some Korean international students over for dinner, and they said they were afraid to go downtown because their friends told them they would get harassed...

Unfortunately, I can attest to some of their concerns.

• One time, someone said something like "5-dollars sucky sucky" when Jim and I were walking into Bijan's. I thought Jim was going to lose his chili. That was a great way to start a birthday dinner.
• One of my Asian guy friends was harassed while working downtown one night. A bunch of guys started interfering with his job, and he asked them to leave... they started saying crap about him doing kung-fu on them. (which on a funny note, he does know Martial Arts)
• A former small-town police chief called me Connie Chung... "Hey, we've got Connie Chung here to do a story!"
• A water patrol officer called me Michelle Kwan. That was an accident, but still, WTF?
• A viewer writes, "if you only knew how we Ozarkians feel about this..." Guess what? It's "Ozarkers" first-of-all, and secondly, I claim to be one every now and then...
• An extremely beloved and former worker of mine told me that I'm a hard worker because I have the "Asian Gene". Seriously?
• Another former co-worker showed me a video he took of an Asian woman dressed in a scantily clad outfit, while calling her "Michelle" on tape. He later lost his job for a number of things.
• Strange men have randomly come up to me and asked if "Asian women are good in bed." How the hell would I know?

The list goes on. It freaking kills me. Anyway, long story even longer...

Today, I was on a computer in a public place, looking at pizza recipes for my other blog. Some dude comes up out of nowhere and asks me if I'm looking for a sushi pizza recipe. A what?

Pseudo Re-enactment:

Michelle typing.

guy: Hey, what are you doing, looking at pizza recipes?

ms: Yes.

guy: Are you looking at sushi pizza recipes?

ms: No... what?

guy: I don't like raw fish.

ms: OK.

guy: Nope.

ms: You know, not all sushi is raw.

guy: If it's raw I'm not gonna eat it. No way.

ms: gasp.

Guy walks away.

Michelle is annoyed... it boils and festers and builds and spews out on her blog.

OKAY, so it's not like someone threw a box of rice at me (which happened once... thank you Nathan for scarring me for life.)

But it still pisses me the F off.

Jim's argument is that this kind of stuff happens everywhere. I agree, but to an extent... but I always tell him he'll see it more if we have biological children together. I don't mean to go on a soap box, but I can't believe people are so ignorant... little comments like that are so irritating. I WOULDN'T EVEN EAT A G-D SUSHI PIZZA! WHO WOULD?! THAT SOUNDS TOTALLY DISGUSTING!! I suppose because I'm Asian, that's the first thing some f-ing loser thinks I would eat. I also eat fish heads and rice, man. And I excel at math and science. I also play the piano in my spare time, but I am naturally gifted at the violin, too. And let's not forget, I'm very subserviant to men.

LET ME JUST CLARIFY: I grew up here. This is my home state. And sometimes it sucks to live here. This is such an issue for international adoptees... and even first-generation kids. I mean, I'm nearly 30 and I still put up with this. This is a life-long struggle that needs to be addressed better in our schools, the government, our workforce, and in our general lives. This is why we need more resources for adoptees and minorities in the Ozarks.

We have to do better for our children.

Which reminds me, do you know there are more religious hate groups in Arkansas than in any other state in the nation? That's according to the Southern Poverty Law Center. RELIGIOUS HATE GROUPS. Does anyone see anything weird with that?

**And on another side note, I love all people. I am not bashing on any group... most of my family is Caucasian, and on most days, I would laugh if someone called me a banana (yellow on the outside, white on the inside.) Afterall, what would you expect?**

Michelle vs. Michelle

Look, I'm kind of embarassed to say this, but it's been bothering me. I am not Michelle Kwan. I know, I know, I have the grace and body of a national figure skating champion...so it's a little confusing...

Seriously, though. I have had two incidents in 3 days when someone called me Michelle Kwan.

First, it was Saturday. Bless the Masons, but one of them called me MK. Then today during my story, a man I interviewed also called me MK. What is going on???

I'm considering changing my name to something less confusing, maybe Kristi??

To be continued...

See, people are racist everywhere!

OCA, a national Asian Pacific American (APA) organization dedicated to ensuring social justice for Asian Pacific Americans, expressed outrage at an offensive radio segment aired on WFNY 92.3 FM (New York City) on 5 April 2007, and re-aired on 19 April 2007.

The segment features a prank call made by station DJs JV and Elvis to a Chinese restaurant in which they make numerous comments that demean Asian Pacific Americans, women, and the gay community.

During the six-minute segment, the DJs address restaurant employees as "Asian lady" and "Chinese man"; make demands for "lots of Asian food, son of a b****"; and ask for "shrimp flied lice" and "some old dung."

The DJs also accost one woman on the phone, saying, "Should I come to your restaurant so that I can see you naked. that way I can see your hot Asian spicy a**." They tell another restaurant employee, "You are a very nice Chinese man. probably can't drive for s***, but who cares." The DJs also call one employee "faggy."

"The blatant racism, sexism, and homophobia in this segment and in the DJs' other work is appalling," said, Ginny Gong, OCA National President, "We will be working with our chapters in the New York City metropolitan area as well as our partners in the civil rights community to seek an apology from WFNY and to demand that the DJs and producers who are responsible for airing this racist segment are fired."

"If the executives of CBS, CBS Radio and 92.3FreeFM do not fire the DJs and their producer, they are sending a very strong message to the Asian American community that they do not care," said Jeannette Wang, OCA-Westchester/Hudson Valley chapter president, "A strong signal must be sent that this type of broadcasting is unacceptable."

All I can say is "WOW".

GO read about Sex in Springfield

I wrote a short article about Asian Fetish in GO Magazine's sex issue...

First, from a serious standpoint,

I think all Asian women have encountered someone who appears to dig all-things Asian.

Adoptive parents--get ready.

It really is an issue among Asian women, and it's one that I've heard adult adoptees speak about countlessly--whether on the streets or in a discussion group.

Secondly, my boyfriend hates this.

FYI, he does not have a thing for all-things Asian.

Gross.

On a more fun note, the story is meant to be light-hearted.

After all, I do own a t-shirt that reads, "everyone loves an Asian girl".

Hey, sometimes we have to let our hair down and not take things so seriously!

Now...onto the story-->>>

Yellow Fever

What is it about Asian women that drives people crazy?
BY Michelle Sherwood

Even the Queen City’s queen of kink had a modest start to the world of fetishes. Before Mistress Onika could be seen spanking half-naked women at Springfield nightclubs, the local underground celebrity was simply a teenager with a curiosity and a fetish magazine.

Hence, another Asian fetish was born.

Miss Onika’s first Asian-woman-crush was on bondage-beauty Masuimi Max. The half-Korean, half-German fetish model had her own simple beginnings in Arkansas, but her red tattoos and rebel-yell attitude make her one of the most sought-after women in the erotic fashion industry. “There was a photo of her sitting in this chair, bound up with wax dripping off her legs,” Miss Onika remembers of her first glimpse at Skin Two Magazine. “There was something sexy about her eyes. She was very beautiful.”

From that moment, Miss Onika was hooked. Shannon, a 30-something Springfield Asian, finds it flattering. "People seem to be fascinated with the exotic,” she says. “I enjoy calling it yellow fever.”

Exotic and submissive may be the two reasons Miss Onika takes a fancy to Asian women and Asian cultures. She even gets a little turned on when she’s out to dinner. “We’ll go to Fuji’s or something, and there’ll be the cutest waitress who’s very, very quiet and submissive and willing to please us,” she says.

However, some self-proclaimed “vanilla rice” experts believe this is not only unhealthy, but dangerous.“These people are not open to dating women of other races,” says former KY3 weekend anchor Lee Ann Kim. She calls these people Asianphiles. “They objectify Asian women so much as a whole and fantasize about them as the perfect girlfriend—submissive, sexual, exotic, et cetera. It’s scary.”

Miss Onika roleplays with a local fetish troupe called Dangerous Dolls, but even she has yet to hook up with an Asian person. To her, it’s just a fantasy—“But if I found an Asian girl who would be willing to be tied up and spanked, then by all means, I would definitely be down."

Abduction, The Megumi Yokota Story

This has won just about every documentary award out there this year, and it sounds like it will be the one to see:

This is the story of a 13-year-old Japanese girl who never returned home from school. That was November 1977. Years later, her parents found out the truth: she had been abducted by North Korean spies!

ABDUCTION points to one of today's biggest human rights and political crises in Asia - the abduction issue, is one of the major untold stories behind Japan and North Korea's tense relations, a key factor affecting nuclear talks.

The LA Times calls it "Extraordinary! Spine-tingling!" and a work of "Narrative Mastery!"

Opens January 12, 2007 in New York City:
CINEMA VILLAGE, 22 E. 12th Street, New York, NY, (212) 924-3363

And we should hope, The Moxie???

For more info, visit: www.abductionfilm.com

MY LAST ROSIE POST (unless she apologizes)

Asian Leaders Angered by Rosie O'Donnell's 'Ching Chong' Comments
Monday , December 11, 2006
By Sara Bonisteel

NEW YORK — Note to Rosie O'Donnell: Stick to singsong.

"The View" co-host is in hot water for using the expression "ching chong" to describe Chinese people talking about Danny DeVito's drunken appearance on her show.

"The fact is that it's news all over the world. That you know, you can imagine in China it's like: 'Ching chong … ching chong. Danny DeVito, ching chong, chong, chong, chong. Drunk. 'The View.' Ching chong," O'Donnell said on a Dec. 5 episode of "The View."

The statement didn't sit well with John C. Liu, a New York City councilman, who fired off a letter to "View" co-host Barbara Walters.

"The 'ching-chong' bit is not a trivial matter," Liu told FOXNews.com. "It really hits a raw nerve for many people in the community — many like myself, who grew up with these kinds of taunts. We all know that it never ends at the taunts."

Liu isn't the only one offended.

The Asian American Journalists Association called O'Donnell's comments a "mockery" that gives "the impression that [Asian Americans] are a group that is substandard to English-speaking people."

Liu said his office has received complaints from around the New York area following the appearance. He directed his letter to Walters instead of O'Donnell because as producer of the show, he said, she ought to know better.

"It's just stupidity, and it's stupidity that justifies a response," Liu said of O'Donnell's behavior, adding the comments came "from someone who has been indignant herself when it comes to comments made by other people where she has perceived it as being negative against a particular community."

In November, O'Donnell made up with Kelly Ripa, co-host of "Live With Regis and Kelly," after accusing her of homophobia for pushing Clay Aiken's hand away from her mouth on the program.

O'Donnell remains unfazed.

"She's a comedian in addition to being a talk show co-host," Cindi Berger, O'Donnell's spokeswoman, said in a statement. "I certainly hope that one day they will be able to grasp her humor."

On Dec. 8, O'Donnell wrote in her blog "it was not my intent to mock." She clarified her position on Dec. 10, calling the bit "comedy."

"I do many accents and probably will continue to," she wrote. "My mom in law impression offends some southerners. What can u do? I come in peace."

O'Donnell is not the first comedian to raise the ire of the Asian-American community.
In 2001, Sarah Silverman told a joke on "Late Night With Conan O'Brien" that had the punch line "I love Chinks."

The NBC program issued an apology to Guy Aoki, the president of the Media Action Network for Asian Americans, following Silverman's appearance.

Liu is still waiting for an apology for O'Donnell's comments.

"I think an acknowledgement that it was a mistake would be very much appreciated by the community," he said.

Rosie O'Donnell Makes Fun of Chinese People!

The Asian American Journalists Association has responded, saying: "We feel strongly that it is our responsibility to call attention to what we consider a mockery of the Chinese language and, in effect, a perpetration of stereotypes of Asian Americans as foreigners or second-class citizens."

Rosie's response (in basic terms, according to the NY Post): "Asians need to lighten up."

I find this personally appalling because Chinese people don't speak in a "ching chong" dialect...there is no humor in this.

As an Asian person who got this kind of crap from kids all through elementary school, I find this incredibly troubling and irresponsible for this woman to get on national television and do this...especially when she prides herself on being a gay activist.

Just a few weeks ago, she accused Kelly Ripa of being homophobic after Ripa and Clay Aiken had an uncomfortable exchange on "Live with Regis and Kelly". Aiken, who was filling-in for Regis, put his hand over Ripa's mouth as she was speaking. Ripa was obviously upset, and she responded with something like, "That's a no-no...I don't know where your hands have been..." Rosie about lost her mind on "The View" shortly after, and that's when she accused Ripa of being homophobic. In response to O'Donnell's accusation, Ripa said that she was insulted, partly Aiken would not have put his hand over a man's mouth...meaning that Aiken must not have respect for women--it's interesting to watch on YouTube, if you've got 5 extra minutes--


Otherwise, I'd like to end with this statement: Rosie O'Donnell is a disappointment. So is The View.